Tag: Relatively Speaking
What to do when there is a cable guy growing in your garden
When you live in a developed neighborhood, it is understood that there will be utility easements with which you will have to contend. Like, if you want to spit in your own yard, you need to get a permit, call OUPS for utility markings, submit a drawing of where you are going to spit, and wait for final approval before you launch your loogie.
Perfectly perpetuating your pet in paint
There has been a new trend in recent years for raising money for noble causes. Sometimes called Paint and Partake, Booze and Brushes, Paint and Pour, Sips and Splatters; the “art” of creating a complete painting in three hours while indulging in the fruit of the vine has become a very popular event.
A potentially embarrassing exterior adornment
Sitting at the breakfast table in our sunroom, I said to the wife, “You know what? I feel sorry for kids today who don’t have all 22 volumes of World Book Encyclopedias on a book shelf.”
Getting life and patio estimates
At some point in the life of a property owner a change of some sort may be desired or required. Be it a new roof, furnace, sunroom, bathroom remodel, or just a new color, sooner or later a project will happen.
Relatively Speaking: Parenting a very hairy toddler
Let’s just imagine for a moment that you are in your 60s or 70s and in a weak moment, you decide to adopt a toddler.
What to do when your wife has a leek
At the age of 70, combined with being a writer for the past 31 years, there is a piece of equipment I have never owned: my very own laptop.
Finding your risk tolerance is an investment in antacids
By a show of hands, who is comfortable with the volatility of their investments? Just as I thought. I don’t see any hands, but then I am inside your newspaper and can’t see you very well.
I don’t care for Medicare physicals
“Honey,” the wife said, “how did your Medicare physical go today? Did you do well?”
Relatively Speaking: Local man’s meniscus crushed by falling tree
Back in September, I tore my meniscus. Before this injury, I thought a meniscus was something that was thrown by naked men in ancient Olympics, you know, the meniscus throwers.
My cell phone … it’s a classic, a collectible, an heirloom
In every household there is one person who is the techy, the IT specialist, the problem solver, when the electronics malfunction.