|To the Editor: BG man imagines conversation between Latta and Boehner over shutdown vote|
|Written by Russ Frye|
|Saturday, 02 November 2013 09:16|
To the Editor:
A transcript between a fictitious Congressman, Bob Ladda, and the fictitious Speaker of the House, John Bainer:
John: "Bob, why in the world did you vote against ending the government shutdown and raising the debt ceiling? It's never happened in the history of our country!"
Bob: "But by not raising the debt ceiling we could have defeated Obamacare."
John: "No, Bob. That's not what would have happened. The Affordable Care Act would have gone forward whether the debt ceiling was raised or not. But not raising the debt ceiling would have been disastrous to our economy."
Bob: "John, you're just one of those gloom-and-doomers. Not only have I become a Tea Party member, but I'm also now a member of the Deny'ers. Do you really think anything would have happened if we defaulted on our loans? Hah, is what we say. We also deny global warming, deny that regulations protect Americans, deny gun purchase background checks are a good thing, deny evolution, and deny the moon landing. By the way, did you see the documentary of Sandra Bullock and George Clooney in space? Wow!"
John: "Bob, remember how we've urged you not to say too much, to have your staff issue press releases? Talking's just not your thing. We were looking at the results of your last election and were surprised to find that in Bowling Green, your hometown, your opponent received more votes than you did. You lost 14 of the 19 precincts and you lost the precinct right across the street from where you grew up. "
John: "That list we had you make, with the NRA first, followed by your largest campaign donors? Well, to stay in office, make sure you vote according to that list and as we direct you to vote. Never debate an opponent. And don't even think about changing your last name. That's key."
Bob: "But don't we have to worry when I don't even carry my hometown?"
John: "No worries, Bob. If you look at the Congressional districts in Ohio, they look like someone drew them with an Etch-a-Sketch. The Ohio legislature, with Republicans in the majority, drew those district boundaries with the sole purpose of ensuring you and other Republican Representatives stay in office. And those district boundaries stay in effect for ten years."
John: So Bob . . . just remember, shhhhhhhh."
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