The AIDS epidemic was a tragic
era in American history, but it’s kind of yesterday’s news, right?And if you’re not a gay male, it really
isn’t anything to be worried about anyway.Unless you talk to Denise Neiding.The 62-year-old Toledo
grandmother has been HIV-positive since 2008. Being white and middle class didn’t protect her."I was
married for over 20 years until my husband left me for a much-younger woman." Trying to feel better
about herself, and boost her severely damaged ego, Neiding admits, "I got a little rebellious and had a
little promiscuous spell in my life."She paid dearly for that spell.Neiding was a featured panelist at
the "Voices of Women Affected by HIV/AIDS" program held Wednesday in the Women’s Center at Bowling
Green State University.Betsy Bunner, AIDS education director at the university, reminded: "It’s not who
you are, but what you do that puts you at risk for HIV."And increasingly, women are becoming the most
common face of the disease."Worldwide, women are disproportionately affected, just because when we look
at biological factors, it’s easier to transmit" via heterosexual intercourse because the vaginal lining
is a larger area than is the case with men’s anatomy, Bunner said.Worldwide, 63 percent of all young people
ages 15-24 living with HIV are females."In the U.S. we may have had more men (in the AIDS-affected
population) but we are moving in the same direction" as the world-at-large, where AIDS can no longer be
considered primarily a disease of the gay community.Bunner offered more sobering statistics:• Heterosexuals
accounted for 25 percent of estimated new HIV infections in 2010. New infections among women are attributed
to heterosexual contact (84 percent) or IV drug use (16 percent).• Women accounted for 20 percent of new HIV
infections and 24 percent of those living with HIV."People think maybe it’s gone away," said
Bunner. "It hasn’t. There are 50,000 new infections each year in the U.S."Here’s a main reason why
the disease continues to spread:An estimated 1 in 5 HIV-infected Americans are unaware of their infection,
and these persons account for more than half of all new infections.Since it can take up to a decade for an
HIV-carrier to show symptoms, there is not necessarily anyone to blame, panelists agreed.For Neiding, it
wasn’t until she went on a three-week vacation to visit friends in Trinidad that she began to feel ill with
what she thought was the flu."The first week down there I didn’t feel well. The second week I was in
bed sick, and the third week I was so sick I didn’t think they’d let me on the plane" but she was
determined to get to a U.S. hospital.She made it back to Toledo, where she was diagnosed with viral
meningitis, e-coli "and, I found out later, HIV."The HIV wasn’t discovered until a second
hospitalization, when Neiding was asked: "Do you want to be tested for HIV?" She agreed, even
though, as a 57-year-old, it seemed a remote possibility."Because of my age they did it (the test)
twice" but it came back positive each time.When Neiding received the diagnosis her immediate reaction
was "I’m gonna be sick, I’m gonna die."Now, more than five years later, she considers herself
fortunate."The medicine works for me, although it doesn’t always work for everybody. It’s very
expensive. It costs $1,800 a month."As it turns out, the greatest burden of being HIV-positive isn’t
feeling unwell; she doesn’t. And it’s not her appearance, which is perfectly normal. "It’s the
stigma."Panelist Kenyetta White agreed stigma is the worst thing about AIDS."People still feel
like it’s the plague. They don’t want to hug you."That’s why for years, Neiding was unwilling to date
anyone, although she now has a supportive boyfriend."It’s a federal crime if you don’t disclose your
HIV-positive status before having sex with someone," she said. "You can go to prison for four
years."White doesn’t have HIV but is employed with the Ryan White Program at University of Toledo
Medical Center, which helps cover the expenses of HIV/AIDS medications for Neiding and others.White, 41,
says it is guilt that propelled her into a lifelong career fighting AIDS.She told the BGSU audience about a
favorite step-sister, Bobetta, who served in the U.S. military and "when she got out of service began
dating a man."Ten years later Bobetta, who had been living in New York, returned to Toledo."It was
a Wednesday. She called and said ‘Hey, I’m in town’" and wanted to meet with her siblings. They agreed
on the following Monday.On Friday she called again and warned White, "I don’t look the same."On
Saturday the siblings called Bobetta and told her something had come up, they needed to reschedule.
"We’ll see you next week."But next week never came. She died that Monday."Bobetta had never
revealed the truth to her family. She had decided to try to reenlist and the military physical revealed she
was HIV-positive."She got AIDS from a guy who gave it to 18 women here" in northwest Ohio.Due to
either religious beliefs or shame, she never went to doctors and never took AIDS medicine, dying at 32 of a
disease that in this era is considered chronic, rather than deadly.Here are some sobering
HIV/AIDS statistics for the United States:• It is estimated that 1 to 1.2 million Americans
are living with AIDS or HIV.• Approximately 53 percent of those diagnosed with AIDS have died.• Hispanic
women have infection rates 4.2 times that of white females and Hispanic men have infection rates 2.9 times
that of white males.• African Americans represent about 12 percent of the population, but account for
roughly 44 percent of new HIV infections.• Unless the course of the epidemic changes, an estimated 1 in 16
black men and 1 in 32 black women will be diagnosed with AIDS.• In the U.S., one person is infected every 9
1/2 minutes.Some worldwide statistics:• There were 34 million people living with HIV/AIDS worldwide in
2011.• 63 percent of all young people ages 15-24 living with HIV are young women.• 50 percent of people
living with HIV do not know they have the virus.• The rate of new HIV infections has been halved in 25 low-
and middle-income countries between 2001 and 2011.• Another 2.5 million people acquired HIV in 2011.U.S.
statistics are from a 2010 Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report.The worldwide figures are from
the World Health Organization.